"Like the company on ebay I bought it from selling 10,000 things from China last year is just going to let me send it back to them because of a screwed up D pad... let alone replace it."|
Have you at least tried to send them an email? I mean, it's that company who sold the product to you. If you buy to a company that you already think it's not very trustworthy, I don't think it's fair to blame 8bitdo for not replacing it.
In the US, you can buy 8bitdo controllers on Amazon, and I'm 100% sure that you can ask for refund and replacements easily. Why did you choose that ebay importer?